What I learned from Television

I just listened to the March 16 episode of This American Life, entitled "What I Learned from Television." As usual, it was a great episode. You have to listen to it, if only to hear Ira Glass talk about his love for "The O.C." --a show I also loved (at least for the first season--Seth & Summer are the cutest couple that ever existed, as far as I'm concerned).

The episode made me want to marry someone who would sing stupid title songs to tv shows with me. It also made me think about what I learned from television, and how my relationship with it has changed over the span of my life.

As a kid, I was horribly addicted to it, and I memorized a schedule for all the shows I had to watch after school, all the way from the afternoon cartoons, through the prime-time sitcoms, and even through late-night TV.

I grew up in a very humorless, dysfunctional family, where I felt very isolated for being the only girl, for being the only one raised mostly in America, for being so much younger than everyone else (my two brothers are both about a decade older than me). So TV was my solace, where I had control of the remote, where I could laugh at good-humored jokes, see how somewhat happy families acted, get a window into other peoples' perspectives, and see how other people resolved their own dramas.

As a result, I acted like an incredible brat if anybody tried to change the channel on me. I'd yell at my brothers, "I was here first!!" And it didn't matter if I had already hogged the tv for 5+ hours. I don't know how I got away with that behavior. I think my parents were just tired by the time I came around.

Much to my dismay as an American-raised kid, my Taiwanese-American family mostly didn't understand the jokes in American sitcoms. But that's what I enjoyed the most. I giggled at "Mork 'n' Mindy", "Night Court", "The Cosby Show", "The Wonder Years," and late-night fare, like "The Johnny Carson Show" & "Arsenio Hall." Sometimes my brother, Peter, would actually run from another room to ask me what I was laughing at (which was incredibly disruptive and irritating).

The type of tv programming that I remember my whole family could sit down to, were things like James Bond movies, Superman movies, "That's Incredible," "The Sound of Music," animal documentaries, beauty pageants, "Herbie the Love Bug" movies, "TV's Bloopers and Practical Jokes," Bruce Lee movies, and intense dramas that I was too young to watch, like "The Killing Fields."

Also, if there was any kissing on the television, my brothers and I were quick to change the channel, for fear of Dad yelling at us. But somehow, watching a little violence was okay. And somehow it was okay for my brother Peter to watch and record Benny Hill.

Since high school, my brother Ted, aspired to be a doctor. So he liked watching "St. Elsewhere" and the occasional surgical operation show. I remember grossing out a little, and he'd say, "What!? It's just your body. It's just blood." And I'd try to buck up and watch some doctor jab someone's bloody guts with stitches and needles. Nowadays when people ask me what Ted does, I say he's an E.R. doctor. Just like the tv show, "E.R.", in Chicago!

When I was in grade school, Ted surprised me by cracking up hysterically at cartoons like "Inspector Gadget" or "Danger Mouse," which seemed pretty dumb to me. That was probably when I started to understand campy humor, like those wonderful "Airplane" movies. And on weekends, Ted sometimes got sucked into cooking shows and Bob Ross's painting instruction shows (after I was done watching Saturday Morning cartoons). He was getting all metrosexual before his time! But he didn't appreciate the family sitcoms as much as I did. He was always a cynical sort and found "The Cosby Show" to be really cheesy.

Ted later adapted more to American pop culture by the time he was in high school. And by then we got cable. So from an early age, (probably 8 or so?) I watched an excessive amount of MTV with my brothers. But Ted would scoff at pretty-boy bands like Duran Duran and say, "Oh, girls just like them cuz they think they're cute." And I'd think, "Yeah, that's stupid! I won't be like those stupid girls." (Eventually, this, coupled with the unspoken understanding that we were never to even speak of kissing, made me completely silent about the topic of boys when I was in the presence of my family. Later in life, Ted told me that my family was kind of worried that I was a lesbian!) Ted also scoffed at Michael Jackson for mostly having more dance talent than musical talent. So I developed a taste for New Wave and Alternative Rock, but secretly I enjoyed all that poppy goodness, like Paula Abdul and LL Cool J.

Ted and I also sometimes rented indie films, that nobody else in the family could appreciate. And we'd also watch Siskel & Ebert... Ted was always a good debator and he probably enjoyed that aspect more, but I liked hearing their film analyses. So I'd like to think that watching Ted's tv habits encouraged me to watch more intelligent tv and movies. He also was the one who got me started on watching shows like "Saturday Night Live." And boy, did I learn a lot of things from that show! I remember him cracking up hysterically at the skit where Mel Gibson played "Dream Gynecologist," and then he looked at me sitting there with a blank face. He said, "Do you know what a gynecologist is?" And he was kind enough to explain the joke so I could laugh too. And so began a love for SNL and more grown-up comedies, that challenged me to figure out what the punchlines were really about.

I also have fond memories of watching tv with my mom. We loved watching old Doris Day and Audrey Hepburn films. And she'd tell me how much she grew up loving movies with dashingly handsome actors like Paul Newman, Cary Grant, Gregory Peck, and Rock Hudson. And we'd admire all the pretty fashion of that era. Mom was great, because even though she didn't get all the American jokes, she'd stay up to watch "Moonlighting" and Johnny Carson with me, even if I was probably too young for it.

I even remember watching the music video for "Faith," by George Michael, during which, my mom actually remarked on how some of these videos were so artistic. Yes, this is the video where George Michael is shakin' his ass in aviator glasses, a leather jacket, jeans and a guitar, on a white background, with the occasional glimpse of some lady's hot legs tapping her red heels on a jukebox. It was a mesmerizing video. Mom didn't mind as much if I saw people kissing on tv. She might have gotten a little squirmy (as did I) if something vaguely sexual happened on tv, but she never got all in a huff about it. I appreciated that she trusted me to have the maturity to handle certain shows or subjects.

By the time I got to college, I finally discovered how to have fun without the tv. I didn't need to watch it, which was really remarkable. I didn't even miss it! In fact, I preferred to do OTHER THINGS. I missed several seasons of "Seinfeld," one of the best sitcoms ever, when I was at UCLA, and I didn't even mind that much.

In the summer after sophomore year, I finally moved out of the dorms and into an apartment, with 3 lovely roommates. I got along with them great, except that we had very little in common when it came to TV. When I would have wanted to watch "Seinfeld," two of them would want to watch "Living Single." Even worse, the other roommate's favorite show was "Family Matters." I couldn't believe it. I always wondered who watched these shows, and I finally met one. But I let them watch their wacky shows and miss what I'd normally prefer to watch. I felt like a recovered tv addict. (This is also the apartment where I finally learned to enjoy the occasional Cosmo magazine, that I had looked upon so warily for years. The roommates put me to the ultimate test, though when they put Selena's "Dreaming of You" on our outgoing voicemail recording.)

Nowadays, I have Netflix and super-basic cable. That means no more MTV or even Bravo! Before last year, MTV was still my guilty pleasure on weekends. I still sort of miss shows like "Made," "Pimp My Ride," and "Next." But I feel okay without it now. Instead of sitcoms, nowadays, I love "CSI:NY" and the occasional cheesy reality show. I don't think there are any really good sitcoms anymore. That new one, "Notes from the Underbelly" seems mildly promising. I'll Netflix shows like "Entourage" or "Project Runway" for the good cable shows I'm missing, so I think now I balance a mild dose of tv with other activities in my life.

Gender-benders, Star Wars, and Ira Glass

I am just about recovered from a cold. I am also mentally in a daze, because quite a lot of remarkable things happened over the last couple weeks, including (in chronological order, and thus also revealing my "secret project"):

1. I heard a great episode of "This American Life," (well, it's also a bit sad--) called "Quiz Show." They interviewed various puzzle/quiz show competitors, including a guy who competes in the annual MIT Mystery Hunt. His puzzle-solving team is called, "Dr. Awkward" (You get points if you notice something interesting about that name).
   
   So I recommended this episode (on Podcast) to my friend who is big into puzzle competitions. Within a few days of hearing this episode, he just happened to meet one of the Dr. Awkward team members!


2. I met a very knowledgeable hermaphrodite, who likes to garden and tinker with her (his?) computer system. (What did you think I was going to say?)


3. I stayed up all night, finalizing toy design drawings and a portfolio for a college interview in New York.


4. I flew to New York and showed up at the interview, with about 6 hours of sleep over two days.


5. I entered what I thought would be a 1:1 interview, to discover a classroom of applicants, sitting alongside still-life arrangements of toys. We all drew toys for 30 minutes, for our drawing test.
   
   (After three straight days of constant drawing and coloring, my arm was about to fall off, from pain.)


6. One of the applicants looked like a very feminine woman, until she (he?) spoke, in a somewhat low voice. And I think someone called him "Doug."


7. As I observed some Illustration students debate whether Lando Calrissian was played by Billy Dee Williams, it dawned on me that perhaps a third of these applicants were about a decade younger than me, and that I was probably the 2nd oldest applicant in the room.


8. At my 1:1 "interview," I showed my work, and they didn't ask me any questions. Otherwise they seemed to react positively.


9. I nursed a hangover after dancing in NY Chinatown until 4am with three of my girlfriends: one from college, one from last year's SF training hikes, and one from work. It's great to find my different circles of friends merging together!


10. I found myself laughing at how cold it was, and how unprepared I was, as I walked to the New York MoMA in falling snow. I was in a miniskirt and open-toed shoes (and leggings, but no socks), walking in falling snow. Luckily I had a hat, coat, and gloves. (It wasn't snowing when I left the house!)


11. I discovered that with a California ID, you can get an 11% discount card at Macy's New York (resulting in a fantastic celebratory Tokidoki bag purchase, after completing my college interview)



12. I joined a group of coworkers to see a one-man show of Star Wars at the Post Theater in SF (It was very amusing, except I wish I had seen the movies recently, to have fully understood what was going on.) The Canadian actor, Charles Ross, has been doing this show for five years, and he also does a one-man show of "Lord of the Rings"!


13. I got a call at 6am from the Toy Design college, informing me that I'd get a letter and email. (They keep thinking I live in NY.) I dragged myself out of bed, to check my email. It said that the faculty is recommending me for acceptance into the program! (pending my transcripts and general formalities) --woot!


14. That same day, I learned that another team would be stealing--er, borrowing me at work, thanks, in part, to some pies. I didn't even get to have any of this pie, cuz I went home sick!


15. As I started to figure out my plans to move to New York, I pondered the idea of purchasing an adorable red-and-white VW Vanagon, for a road trip across country, like some kind of "Little Miss Sunshine" fantasy.


16. I discovered that they're making a TV show out of "This American Life"! And Ira Glass looks much cuter (in that totally nerdy Jewish way that I love) than I remember! (But he's old and married and in Chicago. Oh well. Did you know that he's related to Philip Glass and had a bad breakup with comic artist, Lynda Barry?)


17. Today, I met one of the guys from the Dr. Awkward team. He was visiting from L.A., AND get this: he attended the New York Toy Fair, where he was promoting a game he designed about "CSI."


18. It was 77° in San Francisco today, and I drove with the convertible top down. Beautiful.