I like my meat and gifts to be square

Last weekend I drove to L.A. to visit friends.

On the drive down, I stopped at a McDonald's to get a quick lunch, only to be reminded of why I had avoided eating there for so many years:

Me: I'd like a fish filet sandwich to go.
Cashier: Excuse me?
Me: I'd like a fish filet sandwich to go.
Cashier: Is that all?
Me: Yes.
Cashier: Would you like that to go?
Me: Uh, yes.

The cashier handed me a reciept and frantically said, "I'll get you another one."

What? But then I noticed that half the reciept was printed all squished because the reciept printer had jammed. But I could still read my order, so it was unnecessary. By the time they gave me the replacement reciept that I didn't want to begin with, I had already picked up my food!

I got on the road and started to eat my meal. As I drove along, I started to notice that the fish tasted a little different. Maybe a little more rubbery. And the batter -- seemed maybe saltier? or had a different sort of seasoning. Well, I hadn't eaten at McDonald's in a few years, so maybe they changed the recipe?

The fish patty is supposed to be square, with a very even yellowy fried batter, but this one was a little browner, with peppery specks. Then I realized they had mistakenly placed a fried chicken patty in my fish filet sandwich! It was in a fish filet box with tartar sauce and cheese!

I mean, I guess it still tasted good w/ tartar sauce, and I didn't want to lose time getting to L.A., so I wasn't going to turn around the car to complain... but what if I was one of those people who didn't eat poultry?

* * *

When I got to L.A., I caught up with my L.A. homeys at Kiyong's annual white elephant gift exchange. I was happy to end up with a box full of cute stuff by "Cram Cream." There were goofy gifts, like a Napoleon Dynamite doll, but overall I don't think there was too much crap. But the best crap gift was the calendar of Monthly Doos. It was a genius white elephant gift, courtesy of Jino.

The next day I had brunch at Cafe 50s, where I was entertained by free magic tricks (they have a magician perform for free at your table on weekends). I have generally enjoyed their burgers and shakes, but don't order their super dry turkey sausage patty.

Then I went to Angie's house for a sample sale by her new label, Square. I picked up some some very charming cards and scarves. Angie nearly lured me into staying in L.A. for a few more days, with plans of tricycling, shopping and eating! I was Pinocchio and Angie was the guy who lures kids to Candyland, where they end up growing donkey ears and ass tails. It sounded so fun, but sadly, I had to decline her offer.

L.A. was fairly warm, compared to NorCal! I heard there were even tornado warnings in SF last weekend! How crazy is that??

Ahh I miss West L.A. Now I have to brace myself for the Chicago cold this weekend!!